


Good Memories

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, F/F, Fluff, Sadstuck, rosemary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-10
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-28 23:39:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/998285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kanaya reminisces about her time on the meteor with Rose, and all that has changed. </p><p>AUTHOR'S NOTE: I wrote this for a fanfiction exchange but ended up being very proud of it. This was supposed to be happy, cute fluff.... oops.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good Memories

A certain emptiness consumes you as you gaze out the window, watching the changing nature of space as it curves and morphs around the hurtling meteor. How long has it been? You can’t remember, exactly, but something like two years have passed since Aradia and Sollux used their powers to launch this huge ball of rock towards Skaia. A slight, barely-audible sigh escapes through the gap between your black-tinted lips.

 

You hear an intake of breath and feel the soft touch of a hand on your shoulder. You don’t even need to turn around to know who it is. “What Is It That You Need, Karkat?” You ask, still looking out the window. There is silence for a pounding, pulsating moment, and then he speaks.

 

“Where is she?”

 

You don’t answer for one, two, three seconds, then angle your body in the chair slightly towards your friend. Sighing once more, deeper, you reply, “I Think We Both Know Where She Is.”

 

Silence ensues once more, and eventually Karkat leaves, his padded footfalls resounding in the nearly-empty room as he walks away. You, however, are still lost in thought, remembering walking by the door of the atrium, the stench of liquor filling your nostrils as you did so.  It’s been a while since that day and yet nothing has changed. Only now, the atrium smells even more strongly of alcohol. Chuckling to yourself, you think, _I’ll Never Be Able To Wash The Scent Out Of The Upholstery._  

 

The cheeriness doesn’t last for long. You care about her, of course. But you have quickly grown tired of picking up endless bottles from the ground, cleaning up the endless messes that hangovers bring. The two of you haven’t really kissed, not properly, in something like three months. Not that you would want to kiss her, now--the smell of liquor emanating from her is much too off-putting

 

Weakly, you try to remember that it wasn’t always this bad. That’s why you stay with her, isn’t it? In some dark part of your mind, you hope that the “help” and “support” you give her will eventually convince her to try to stop drinking, to clean up her act. It’s a weak hope, you know, but after all the strange and implausible things you’ve seen, you’re confident that it’s not impossible. 

 

A memory resurfaces from your first year on the meteor with Rose. A good one, at that. You let yourself fall into the memory, trying to find as much solace as you can.....

 

_She flashes a smile and kisses your cheek. “I was thinking of making cookies. Would you like to join me, Miss Maryam??” You aren’t given a choice as her hand find its way into yours and she drags you away, but you can’t find it within yourself to complain. How did you get to this point? A single gaze from those violet eyes and she had you in the palm of her hand._

 

_When you get to what appears to be an empty room (other than a few tables), Dave is there. With a completely straight face, he holds up two bags of pre-fab cookie batter. “I got the dough, you got the goods?” He asks, and Rose chuckles good-naturedly._

 

_“Of course,” she says, and tosses him a bottle of Faygo._

 

_Eyeing it for a few seconds, after catching it, he mutters, “Thanks, Lalonde. I don’t know why TZ likes this stuff so much, but I need to bring her some or she’ll have another mental breakdown.”_

 

_“No problem,” she replies, and he hands her the bags of cookie dough. After adjusting his shades, he exits the room and you are left alone in a room with Rose._

 

_Grinning, she rips open one of the bags and starts to place individual pieces of dough on one of the tables. With a sharp intake of breath, you grab the bag out of her hands. “You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me. Pre-Made Dough? I Think Not. If We’re Going To Make Cookies, We Are Going To Do This The Proper Way.”_

 

_You throw the package of dough onto the table and pull Rose up against your waist. With a blush, She laughs and closes her eyes, leaving you with a perfect opportunity to kiss her, which she takes advantage of. This only makes her blush more and she pulls out of your reach, gushing._

 

_“Well, well, aren’t you fussy.” She feigns a sigh. “I will admit that I haven’t the slightest idea how to make cookies from scratch. I guess you’ll have to teach me,” She teases, a flirty smile lingering on her lips as she backs towards the counter._

 

_A small smile melting across your lips, you find yourself reaching for two aprons and going in for another kiss._

 

Releasing a breath you had been holding in while reminiscing, you drift out of the memory and back into reality. The cookies turned out well. At least, you had thought so at the time. If you are remembering correctly, Dave remarked that they tasted “like a handful of smuppet ass,” whatever that means. 

 

These are the memories that keep you going, but they also fill you with an overwhelming sense of loss. Days gone by, opportunities lost.... Every day you berate yourself for not seeing the truth sooner, for not getting rid of all the liquor before she could get addicted.

 

Sometimes you wish you could stop loving her, but even after all that’s happened, the way you feel about her remains unchanging, a pulsating heartbeat shining through even the darkest of days. _Despite All of This,_ you think to yourself, a ghost of a smile drifting over your features, _She’s Still Beautiful._ At the exact moment that the thought comes into your mind, Skaia is dark and lonely and your friends are falling apart all around you. And yet, thinking of Rose, you shine brighter than any shooting star.


End file.
